Hey there, journal! It's Kapi, the dancing cat with a whole lot to say about food. Today, I want to talk about something that has been bothering me for years - apples. Yeah, those supposedly "healthy" fruits that everyone seems to love. Well, let me tell you why they are the worst fruit ever!
The Texture Nightmare
First of all, let's address the elephant in the room - their texture. Apples have this weird combination of being both crunchy and mushy at the same time. Like seriously? How is that even possible? It's like taking a bite into an apple is playing Russian roulette with your taste buds.
When I'm craving some fruity goodness, I expect a consistent texture throughout my snack experience. But nope! With apples, you never know what you're gonna get - it could be too hard or too soft or just plain gross.
Tasteless Terrors
Now onto their taste...or should I say lack thereof? Apples are so bland and boring; it's like eating cardboard but without the satisfaction of knowing you've recycled something afterwards.
Sure, they come in different varieties like Granny Smith or Honeycrisp (which sounds more like a cereal brand than an apple), but no matter which one you choose, they all share this common trait: being utterly flavorless.
I mean honestly people tout them as nature's candy...but who wants candy that tastes like nothing?
Annoyingly Astringent
Okay now here comes my biggest gripe with apples - their annoying aftertaste! You know how when you eat an apple and suddenly your mouth feels dry and puckered up? Yeah well guess what – that sensation ain't fun!
It’s almost as if these fruits have some secret agenda against hydration because every time I take a bite out of one it feels like someone sucked out all moisture from my mouth using tiny invisible straws. It's like a punishment for trying to be healthy!
Other Food Rants
Okay, enough about apples and onto some other food rants that have been bugging me lately.
Pancakes: The Breakfast of Champions
Let’s talk pancakes - the epitome of breakfast perfection. Fluffy, golden discs of deliciousness smothered in syrup, what more could you ask for? They are my absolute favorite food ever! Whenever I'm feeling down or need an energy boost before hitting up the dance floor, pancakes are always there to save the day.
Donut Shop Wonders
Speaking of sweet treats, working at a donut shop has its perks too. Sure it can get busy and hectic at times but seeing all those colorful glazed rings just waiting to be devoured makes it all worth it. Plus, I get first dibs on any leftover donuts which is definitely a win-win situation if you ask me.
Tourette Syndrome: Finding Rhythm in Games
Now let's shift gears for a moment and talk about something personal - my Tourette Syndrome. Living with this condition hasn't always been easy but one thing that has helped me cope is playing rhythm games like Dance Dance Revolution (DDR).
When I step onto that dance pad and start grooving to the beat, something magical happens – my tics fade away into oblivion. It's like dancing becomes this therapeutic escape from reality where nothing else matters except nailing those arrows on time.
I may not be able to control every aspect of my life because of TS but when I'm on that DDR machine...oh boy do things change!
Conclusion
So there you have it journal - why apples deserve their place as the worst fruit ever (sorry Granny Smith lovers). From their terrible texture to lackluster taste and annoying aftertaste; these fruits simply cannot compete with other delicious options out there.
But hey everyone has their preferences, right? Just because I dislike apples doesn't mean you have to. So go ahead and enjoy your apple a day while I grab myself a stack of mouthwatering pancakes instead.
Until next time, Kapi