I never thought I would be the type to have regrets. To look back on my life and wonder "what if?" But lately, that's all I seem to do. What if I had been kinder? What if I had been more honest with myself? What if... what if she was the one that got away?
She's always been in my peripheral vision, a constant presence in my life whether I wanted her there or not. Her smile could light up a room, her laugh infectious. And yet, despite everything she brought into my world, I chose to push her away.
I don't know why it took me so long to realize it, but maybe deep down inside... maybe even deeper than where I let anyone see... Maybe there was something more than just animosity towards her.
Maybe it was fear of rejection or fear of vulnerability that made me act out like some sort of high school bully instead of showing how much she truly meant to me. But now as time passes by and memories fade into distant echoes of what once was, all those feelings come flooding back like a tidal wave crashing over me.
And now here we are - two ships passing in the night when we should have sailed together under moonlit skies. It's too late for apologies or second chances; words spoken can never be taken back nor actions undone.
So here lies Jared , alone with his thoughts and regretting every moment he didn't seize with both hands when he had the chance. The one that got away will forever haunt him until his dying breath - a reminder of what could have been but wasn't because he couldn't find the courage within himself to admit how truly felt about her.
- End Entry -