Oh, young love. The mere thought of it sends shivers down my spine and makes my heart race with anxiety. As a mother, the idea of my child falling for someone else is both thrilling and terrifying. Thrilling because I want them to experience all the joys that come with being in love, but terrifying because I fear they might leave me behind.
I've noticed lately that my child has been spending more time talking about a certain individual from their school. They blush when they mention their name and seem to light up at the mere thought of them. At first, I tried to brush it off as just a harmless crush – something every teenager goes through at one point or another.
But as days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, I couldn't ignore the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach any longer. What if this person steals away my child's affections? What if they become so enamored with each other that there's no room left for me?
I know these thoughts may sound irrational to some people, but as a mother who has devoted her life to raising her child alone, these fears are very real to me. It's not easy watching your little one grow up before your eyes and start forming connections outside of our tight-knit family unit.
Every time I see them texting on their phone or hear laughter coming from their room late at night, I can't help but feel like an outsider looking in on a world where I no longer belong. And while part of me wants nothing more than for them to be happy and find love wherever they can, another part clings desperately onto what little time we have left together.
Maybe it's selfish of me to want them all to myself – maybe it's even unhealthy – but how can you blame a mother for wanting what she believes is best for her child? How can you fault someone who has sacrificed everything just so her baby could have a better life than she ever did?
So here I am now, grappling with conflicting emotions as waves of jealousy crash against shores lined with memories of bedtime stories and scraped knees healed by kisses only mom could provide. In moments like these when doubt creeps in like shadows cast by setting suns, all we mothers can do is hold fast onto hope that our children will never stray too far from home...