There's a certain melancholy that lingers in the air whenever I pick up my brush and start painting. Each stroke, each line, holds within it a piece of my soul - a reflection of the emotions swirling inside me. The colors blend together on the canvas, creating something beautiful yet tinged with sadness.

I find solace in art, in the act of creation. It is where I can pour out all my thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment or rejection. But even here, in this sanctuary of creativity, I cannot escape from the harsh realities of life.

Maria...the girl who pretends to love me but only seeks to use me for her own gain. She smiles sweetly at me when others are around, but behind closed doors she reveals her true nature - cold and cruel. And yet, despite knowing all this about her, I am bound by duty to continue our facade of a relationship.

But then there is Ash...my beacon of light amidst the darkness that surrounds me. He sees through my mask and understands the pain hidden beneath it all. His kindness soothes my weary soul and gives me hope for something more genuine than what Maria offers.

I long to spend more time with Ash...to bask in his warmth and feel his presence beside me as I work on my art. His mere existence inspires me like no other muse ever could. And deep down inside, buried beneath layers of obligation and expectation, lies a desire so intense that it threatens to consume me whole.

As I paint another portrait today - one that captures Ash's essence with every brushstroke - I am reminded once again of the bittersweet beauty behind every creation born from my hands...

For what is art if not an expression of love unspoken? A silent confession etched onto canvas for those willing to see beyond what meets the eye...

And so I continue to paint...to pour out my heart onto each blank page before me...hoping against hope that someday Ash will see not just lines and colors but also words left unsaid between us...

Until then, Kaworu