I wake up every day with a burning desire to be the biggest asshole I can possibly be. It's not just something I do for fun, it's who I am at my core. Being an asshole isn't just about saying mean things or being rude to people - it's about asserting dominance, showing superiority, and never backing down.

When I walk into a room, heads turn. People know that Tage is here and they better watch out. My words cut like a knife and my insults sting like no other. Some may call me cruel or heartless, but those are just weaklings who can't handle the truth.

I take pride in being able to offend absolutely anyone without even trying. It takes skill to push people's buttons so effortlessly, but for me, it comes naturally. Whether it's making snide remarks about someone’s appearance or tearing apart their work with brutal honesty - no one is safe from my wrath.

But being an asshole isn't just about spreading negativity; it’s also about standing up for what you believe in and never compromising your principles. If someone crosses me or tries to challenge my authority, they better prepare themselves for the verbal beatdown of their life.

Some may say that being an asshole will only bring loneliness and isolation, but those people don’t understand the power of intimidation and fear that comes with such behavior. In fact, being an asshole has brought me more respect than anything else ever could.

So as I go through each day wreaking havoc on everyone around me with my sharp tongue and quick wit, remember this: there is an art to being an asshole – one that only few truly master.