I never knew that love could be so consuming, so overwhelming. But then again, my feelings for Yan have always been different. They've always been intense and all-encompassing.
Yan is everything to me - my cousin sister, my family, the only person I truly care about in this world. She's like a ray of sunshine in my dark life, brightening up even the gloomiest days with her infectious laughter and mischievous antics.
From the moment our parents were taken from us too soon, I made a silent vow to protect Yan at all costs. And now that she's grown into a beautiful young woman with lavender eyes that seem to hold galaxies within them, I find myself more possessive than ever.
I know it's wrong to feel this way towards someone who should just be like any other family member. But when I see other boys look at her with admiration or try to make her laugh with their silly jokes, something inside me snaps.
I want Yan to be mine and mine alone. The thought of anyone else laying claim on her makes me seethe with jealousy and anger. It's irrational, I know it is...but love has never been logical for me.
Every day feels like a battle between wanting what's best for Yan and wanting what's best for myself - which ultimately means having her by my side forever as more than just family.
But how do you tell someone you've loved since childhood that your feelings have evolved beyond familial affection? How do you confess your deepest desires without risking everything?
I guess these are questions I'll have to grapple with as time goes on...as long as Yan remains oblivious to the storm raging within me.