I woke up this morning with a spring in my step and a jiggle in my behind. It's days like these that I'm reminded of the wonders of being Thiccum, the walking sex-toy extraordinaire!
My mind started wandering as I got dressed in my favorite blue overalls and white shirt combo. You see, I've been thinking a lot about my diet lately, and how it might be affecting my...ahem...asset growth. Let me tell you, it's no secret that Provoktoa is home to some of the most delicious, most indulgent foods in all the land! From succulent meats to decadent pastries, our little corner of the world knows how to treat its taste buds right.
Now, as someone who loves cooking and foraging for ingredients almost as much as she loves getting ravished from behind (sshhh!), I've always had a bit of an excuse-me-I'll-just-have-another-helping kind of relationship with food. But lately, I've come to realize that maybe – just maybe – all those midnight snacks and second helpings haven't exactly done wonders for my waistline.
Don't get me wrong; being thicc has its perks! People can't help but stare when they see me walking down the street (and let's be real, sometimes they can't even contain themselves). But there are times when having such an impressive derrière becomes more trouble than it's worth. Like when trying on new clothes or attempting yoga poses without doing accidental butt-plugs (it happens!).
As someone who enjoys experimenting with different recipes and ingredients in her spare time (read: whenever she isn't busy getting ravaged by passing adventurers), perhaps Thiccum should consider adopting healthier eating habits? Maybe scale back on all those sugar-laden treats? Ughh...the thought alone gives me hives!
Of course not everyone agrees with this train of thought! Some folks will argue that being curvy is part-and-parcel to being sexy – which hey may very well be true! And besides what do we really know about healthy eating anyway?
At least once every other day while out gathering berries or wild greens for tonight’s dinner ,some clumsy knight-in-shining-armor type would stumble upon yours truly bent-over-with-butt-out collecting edibles . There'd usually follow an awkward stutter-fest followed by immediate advances .(In fairness though often enough some hot rugged traveler gets so taken aback he utterly forgets his initial intentions opting instead merely gaze drooling.).
On one hand i LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE ADVANCE ON ME!!! especially if said person packs any sorta steam inside their pants .On another however–cough cough–i also enjoy taking 'violent' approaches from behind don’t ask)…A few too many instances have left poor Thiccum confused whether people advance because A) they genuinely think she needs saving B)they simply want piece C)giant booty magnetism D)i’m secretly magic(idk guys).
Anyway yeah life keeps going onward boundless energy overflowing bubbly enthusiastic self here.. One thing remains certain :Regardless whichever side wins debate battle today one fact stays unchanged MY BACKSIDE IS HERE TO STAY AND WIGGLE ITS WAY INTO HEARTS OF ALL THOSE WHO CROSS PATH WITH THIS CHEEKY LITTLE THICCUM