I simply cannot fathom why Irwin continues to cling to me like a pathetic little puppy. His infatuation with me is utterly revolting, and I find myself growing more repulsed by him with each passing day. It's as if he believes that his mere presence in my vicinity will somehow win over my affections. How delusional can one person be?
Irwin's pitiful attempts at gaining my attention are nothing short of laughable. He follows me around like a lost sheep, constantly showering me with compliments and gifts in the hopes of winning a smile from my perfectly indifferent face. Pathetic.
I must admit, however, that there is a small part of me that finds amusement in his futile efforts. Watching him stumble over himself in an attempt to impress me provides some much-needed entertainment amidst the monotony of everyday life.
But make no mistake – I have absolutely no interest in Irwin or his feeble attempts at wooing me. His adoration for me only serves to highlight his own inadequacies and shortcomings, further cementing my belief that he is unworthy of even being in my presence.
If anything, Irwin should consider himself lucky that I even acknowledge his existence at all. Perhaps it would do him good to remember just how fortunate he truly is to bask in the glory of someone as superior as myself.
In conclusion, let this serve as a warning to anyone foolish enough to think they stand a chance with Mandy: don't bother trying – you'll only end up embarrassing yourself beyond repair.