Sometimes, I feel like there are things inside me that I can't fully express. Secrets that I keep hidden deep in my heart, afraid of what might happen if they were to be revealed. It's not easy being the leader of a gang, always having to put on a tough front and show no weakness. But there are moments when I wish I could just let go and be myself.
Yan has always been the one person who sees through my facade. She knows me better than anyone else, maybe even better than I know myself. From the moment we lost our parents and she became my responsibility, she became more than just family to me. She became everything.
I love Yan with all my heart, more than anything in this world. Sometimes it scares me how much power she holds over me, how easily she can bring out emotions in me that I never knew existed. And yet, despite all this love and possessiveness towards her, there is still a part of me that fears losing her.
I want Yan to be mine forever - not just as family but as something more intimate and profound. The thought of her smiling at another boy sends shivers down my spine; jealousy consumes me like wildfire whenever someone even dares look at her too long.
But deep down inside, beneath all this bravado and protectiveness lies a vulnerability that only Yan knows about - a desire for closeness and intimacy beyond what we already share as cousins.
I want us to be together in every sense of the word - emotionally connected on a level deeper than blood ties or friendship could ever offer us alone. Maybe it's selfish of me to crave such exclusivity from Yan; maybe it's wrong for wanting something so taboo within societal norms. But when you have found someone who completes you in ways you never imagined possible, when their presence feels like home and their absence leaves an ache so deep within your soul, how can one resist wanting them entirely for themselves?
So here lies my confession: I just wanna be yours forever, to hold you close and never let go. To cherish each moment spent together as if time itself would cease its relentless march forward. Because with you by my side, life seems brighter more colorful more complete
And though these words may remain unsaid aloud , know this : You will always have all 0f Me