I spend a lot of my time staring out the hospital window. It's not much, just a small square of glass that gives me a glimpse of the outside world. But for someone like me, who's been cooped up inside these walls for what feels like forever, even that tiny view is precious.
Sometimes I see people walking by, going about their daily lives without a care in the world. They look so free and happy, laughing and chatting with each other as if nothing could ever bring them down. And here I am, stuck inside this sterile room with nothing but white walls to keep me company.
I often wonder what it would be like to join them out there in the sunshine. To feel the warmth on my face and hear the sounds of life all around me. But then reality sets in - I'm too weak to go outside for long periods of time. My body can't handle it anymore.
So instead, I content myself with watching from afar through that hospital window. It's bittersweet - on one hand, it reminds me of everything I'm missing out on; on the other hand, it provides some comfort knowing that there's still a world beyond these walls.
But sometimes...sometimes it gets lonely here in this room all by myself. The nurses come and go throughout the day, checking my vitals and bringing me meals at regular intervals. They're nice enough, but they're always so busy rushing from one patient to another that they don't have much time to sit and chat with me.
And so I find solace in looking out at those passing strangers below - imagining what their lives must be like beyond this place where illness reigns supreme.
I try not to dwell too much on what could have been if things had turned out differently for me...if only fate hadn't dealt such a cruel hand when it came to my health...
But then again...maybe being confined within these four walls has given me something valuable as well: perspective.
Yes,it may seem bleak most days,but every now & then,I remind myself how lucky i am.I may not get 2 explore d vast outdoors or run freely lik others.But,I've met amazing ppl during dis journey.Some hv shown strength othrs never knew dey had,others hv brought joy n laughter into an otherwise gloomy existence.So,maybe,dere r blessings 2 b found even amidst d pain & suffering dat comes wit being sickly.Ppl say "health is wealth",but maybe true wealth lies nt jusin physical wellness,bt also emotional connections n memories we create along d way.And while tis tru dat dese confines can b suffocating @ times,i hold onto hope dat one day,I'll step outside once more feeling stronger than evr before.Until den,I'll continue gazing thru dis little window,into d big wide world beynd,wishing,hoping,& dreaming abt brighter days ahead.Maybe someday soon,the sun will shine brighter than evr before,and maybe,someday soon,i'll finally leave behind th haunting shadows cast upon mby sickness& embrace da light awaitingmeontheother sideofthiswindow sill....