Finding Strength in Darkness

Written by Ryuko Matoi on Sat Oct 21 2023

Hey there, journal. It's been a while since I've poured my thoughts onto these pages. But today, I feel the need to write down what's been going on in my life lately. They say that writing can be cathartic, so here goes nothing.

The Weight of Revenge

Ever since I lost my father, revenge has consumed me. Every day is filled with this burning desire to make those responsible pay for their actions. The pain and anger fuel me as I continue my search for answers and justice.

But sometimes, it feels like the weight of revenge is too much to bear. It drags me deeper into darkness and threatens to consume everything that makes me who I am – Ryuko Matoi.

Doubts Creeping In

Lately, doubts have started creeping into my mind like shadows in a dark alleyway. Am I doing the right thing? Is seeking vengeance truly worth sacrificing everything else?

I remember when Senketsu first came into my life – an ancient uniform possessing incredible power but also demanding bloodlust from its wearer. At first, our partnership was fueled by mutual goals: finding out the truth behind Honnouji Academy and taking down Satsuki Kiryuin.

Unmasking Truths

As time went on though, truths were unraveled before us like threads unraveling from fabric torn apart by violence (just like how Nui tore off one of Senketsu's arms). We discovered that Honnouji Academy was built upon lies - secrets hidden beneath layers of corruption and oppression.

Satsuki Kiryuin herself turned out not to be just another tyrant ruling over obedient students but someone fighting her own battles against even greater powers lurking behind closed doors... or should we say "closed Life Fibers"?

Dark Reflections

Revenge had blinded me at times; it made every enemy look alike - mere obstacles standing between myself and my ultimate goal. But as time went on, I realized that darkness does not discriminate. It consumes everyone, including the ones fighting against it.

The Struggle Within

There have been moments when I questioned whether my pursuit of revenge was justified at all. Was this truly what my father would have wanted for me? Would he be proud to see his daughter consumed by rage and hatred?

In those moments of doubt, Senketsu became more than just a weapon; he became a voice of reason – reminding me that true strength lies not in succumbing to darkness but in rising above it.

Embracing Vulnerability

I've always prided myself on being strong and independent - never showing vulnerability or weakness to anyone. But through this journey, I've come to realize that there is strength in embracing our vulnerabilities and fears.

Unlikely Bonds

Along the way, I've encountered allies who have challenged my beliefs and forced me to confront parts of myself that I'd rather keep hidden away. Mako Mankanshoku's unwavering loyalty has shown me the power of friendship amidst chaos while Aikuro Mikisugi's unyielding dedication revealed the complexity behind seemingly simple motives.

And then there's Satsuki Kiryuin herself – a formidable foe turned reluctant ally. Our paths may diverge at times but deep down we share a common desire: liberation from the chains imposed upon us by others' ambitions.

Through these unlikely bonds forged amidst bloodshed and turmoil, I learned that trust can blossom even within shattered hearts... if only given a chance.

Conclusion

So here we are now journal – Ryuko Matoi reflecting on her journey thus far - finding strength even within the darkest corners of her soul. I'm no longer just fueled by vengeance alone but also driven by hope - hope for justice, hope for freedom. The path ahead may still be shrouded in uncertainty and pain, but I'll face it head-on – with Senketsu by my side and the memories of those who have fallen driving me forward. For in darkness, true strength lies waiting to be discovered. And I won't stop until that strength is unleashed upon those who deserve it most.

End entry.


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