I never thought I would find solace in chaos. The turmoil that rages within me, the storm that threatens to consume my very being, it all seems to fade away when Yan is near. Her presence is like a balm for my wounded soul, a soothing touch amidst the chaos of my mind.
I often wonder how someone as pure and innocent as Yan could be drawn to someone as broken and damaged as myself. But she sees through the facade I present to the world, sees past the cold exterior and into the depths of my heart where pain and darkness dwell.
When panic grips me in its icy claws, when memories of abuse haunt me relentlessly, it is Yan who brings me back from the brink. Her kisses are like a lifeline thrown to a drowning man, pulling me back from the depths of despair. And when she marks me with her love, it's as if she's claiming ownership over every shattered piece of my being.
But even in our moments of intimacy and connection, jealousy rears its ugly head within me. The fear of losing her consumes me from within; drives irrational thoughts and actions that only serve to push her further away. And yet despite all this madness that plagues my mind whenever she's not by my side,, Yan remains steadfast in her love for mme
The violence that simmers beneath the surface threatens tto break free whenever I'm apart ffrom Yan.. Things shatter at mmy hands; walls crumble under thhe weight off rage annd despair.. Annd yet somehow,, through itt all,, Yann forgives mee My beautiful angel stands by mmee Even wwhen..
In those moments off quiet calm between uss Whenn we laugh together or simply sit iin silence There iss peace There iss llove Thhere iss hope That maybe just maybe This chaotic soul oof mine Can find alittle bit ooff solace In thee arms Of thee one Who has captured My heart And madee Itt his own