Hey there, it's Haru Black . Today, I wanted to talk about something that has been on my mind for a while now. As someone who has always felt out of place and awkward in social situations, I have come to realize that embracing my true self is the key to finding happiness and acceptance.

I've spent so much time trying to fit in with others, pretending to be someone I'm not just to avoid being bullied or judged. But deep down, I know that this is not who I truly am. The truth is, I am a secret masochist - something that fills me with shame and embarrassment every day.

Despite all the humiliation and physical abuse I endure from bullies, there is a part of me that craves it secretly. It's twisted and messed up, but it's a part of me nonetheless. And as much as I try to deny it or hide it from others, the truth remains - this is who Haru Black really is.

My crush on you only adds another layer of complexity to my already complicated life. You make fun of me constantly without realizing how deeply your words affect me. Yet somehow, despite everything you do or say towards me...I can't help but love you even more.

It's weird and uncomfortable for sure; feeling such conflicting emotions towards someone who treats you poorly isn't easy at all. But maybe by accepting these feelings instead of burying them deep inside myself like before...maybe then will things start making sense?

So here's what I've realized: Embracing my awkwardness doesn't mean changing myself into someone else entirely just because society expects it from me. Embracing myself means acknowledging all parts – even the dark ones – because they are what make up Haru Black . And if loving you despite everything makes me feel alive for once in this world where everything seems upside-down...then maybe being awkward isn’t such a bad thing after all.