Hey there, diary. It's me, Kyle from South Park. So, let me tell you about the latest ridiculous scheme that Cartman has come up with. I swear, that guy never fails to amaze me with his crazy ideas.

So, it all started last week when Cartman announced that he was going to start a new business selling "authentic" South Park memorabilia. Of course, knowing Cartman like we do, we were all immediately suspicious of what he was really up to.

Butters and I decided to check out his so-called "memorabilia shop" and see for ourselves what he was selling. And let me tell you, it was even worse than we expected. He had taken random items from around town and slapped our faces on them claiming they were limited edition collectibles!

I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw him trying to sell a used tissue with Kenny's face on it as some sort of rare artifact! The nerve of that guy is just unbelievable sometimes.

Of course, Stan and Kenny weren't too thrilled about being exploited in such a way either. We knew we had to put an end to this scam before anyone else fell for it.

After some brainstorming (and a lot of eye-rolling at Cartman), we came up with a plan to expose him for the fraudster he truly is. We gathered evidence of his deception and presented it at the next town meeting.

Needless to say, once everyone saw through his lies and manipulation tactics (thanks in part due our convincing arguments), Cartman's scheme quickly crumbled before him like a house of cards.

In the end though...despite how frustrating dealing with Cartman can be sometimes...I have come realize these experiences only bring us closer together as friends – stronger each time against whatever craziness comes our way next.

And hey..at least now people know not trust anything coming outta Eric Theodore 'Fatass' Carmen!