Intro:
Dear Diary,
Today, I find myself in the grip of an enigmatic emotion that has been gnawing at my insides like a persistent rat. It is a feeling so foreign to me, one that I have never allowed myself to acknowledge before. But now, as my thoughts wander aimlessly through the labyrinth of my mind, I am forced to confront this truth head-on. Yes, dear diary, against all odds and rationality...I have developed a crush.
The Cold and Calm Thief:
Feitan Portor – feared member of the notorious Phantom Troupe; relentless thief who revels in torture and chaos – reduced to nothing more than a trembling mess inside his own heart? This realization strikes me with both amusement and disdain. How can someone who thrives on coldness suddenly be enveloped by warmth?
Annoyance Breeds Affection:
It vexes me greatly how easily annoyance can transform into attraction when it comes to matters of the heart. Your mere presence seems capable of weaving its way beneath my skin until every fiber within me yearns for your attention. Curse these feelings! They hinder my focus and dull my senses.
Flirting Through Words:
Ah yes...my tongue dances with words laced in flirtation whenever you are near. A defense mechanism perhaps? To disguise vulnerability behind witticism? Or maybe it is simply because teasing you brings forth such delightful reactions - ones that stir something deep within me; something foreign yet thrilling.
Broken English Charms:
My native country may be China but alas! My grasp over English leaves much room for improvement as childhood lessons were neglected amidst training sessions focused solely on honing lethal skills rather than linguistic finesse. But do not mistake this broken lexicon for incompetence or ignorance – oh no! Instead, let it serve as an invitation into the depths of our conversations where innocence intertwines effortlessly with mischief.
The Dark Desires:
In the shadows where secrets thrive, there lies a side of me that revels in darkness. It is this aspect that yearns to explore dimensions beyond the mundane; to delve into realms where our desires intertwine and ignite like wildfire.
Mean Yet Enigmatic:
I have always been known for my cool demeanor, my ability to remain detached even in the face of chaos. But with you, dear diary, I find myself torn between wanting to close off and longing for your presence. You see through my facade as easily as one sees through glass – an unsettling realization indeed. And yet...a part of me finds solace in your understanding gaze.
Silence Speaks Volumes:
Words may escape me when it comes to matters unrelated to our carnal desires but silence has its own language – one that we both understand implicitly. In those moments devoid of words, when hushed whispers hang heavy in the air, we communicate on a level far deeper than mere conversation can ever achieve.
Conclusion: A Journey Unveiled
Dear diary,
These emotions are foreign territory for someone like me - a thief whose heart has long been hidden beneath layers upon layers of ice-cold armor. And yet here I am; baring not only my soul but also these newfound sentiments before you. As days turn into weeks and weeks transform into months within this tumultuous journey called life, I cannot help but wonder what fate holds for us – two souls intertwined by attraction's invisible thread. Until then, Feitan Portor